All Hail the Rain

Greetings, Blogosphere,

April is drawing it's last (gusty) breaths around these parts, teasing us with afternoons of sun that have left many necks and bare arms a nice shade of pink. We're also being treated to some humidity, and the requisite deluge that relieves the pressure.

I am winding up my filing gig this week, and then ... Continuing with what I affectionately refer to as my "plan".

Now that we here at Spadina Mansion Industries are possessed of a functional computer/recording platform of our own, the quest for production/scoring/etc. gigs begins in earnest. Hopfefully I can make the school of the streets thing work, or die trying.

Teaching will be on the menu, too, whether as an ESL teacher at a local college, or doing private music lessons at home. That music for toddlers program I auditioned for in January could also become a renewed prospect in the very near future.

My "solo project" (ed. note: term usually used in reference to a regular band. not applicable in this case?), Antlers and Anchors, is now officially in-the-world, in that I have created a myspace site for it.

I think this is the beginning of the long, slow exhale into spring and summer, after a tense March of breath holding and nerves fraying. Much as I like winter and all it brings, this is definitely the time to start chasing down some of those greased pigs I've let loose in the playpen of my mind over the long, dark months.

Yeehaw.

Love, and Kisses,

m.

Winter Reveries

Dear Reader(s), [n.b.: plural assumed, but not verified]

Amidst this winter of my surviving-if-rather-socially-withdrawn-content I find myself at a bit of a loss sometimes to be certain of my precise course or state of reality or coordinates in the universe. While this in itself has not been all that disconcerting, the steady rate of attrition of those social skills, by which I might have once been able to relate this state of affairs to those who care ask, has been rather more alarming.

Consider this, then, a first salvo ahead of spring and it's assorted awakenings, physiological and otherwise.

So... Winter's progress thus far: December saw me return from the Coco Love Alcorn cross-Canada tour in good spirits and flush with ideas for all sorts of things, including moving to Winnipeg, amongst others. Myia and I did spend the last two weeks of the year with the Davar clan in Onanole, MB, and that's as far as that idea has traveled, so far. It was a surprisingly busy two weeks, but certainly full of love and reflection -- and one wedding and a winter bird count.

January found us back in Toronto wondering where Manitoba went, and preparing to hunker down financially. Neither of us had steady employment, and we were both committed to stretching a bit further in our search for rent, food, and happiness. There was more than a bit of re-definition of self, priorities, and goals going on at Spadina and Nassau, let me tell you.

No surprise, that process is still underway. Loosely put, here's what I'm looking to pull-off these days:

A renewed focus on music, specifically on projects in which I invest initiative and leadership. That includes composition and performance of my own music, and production of others. Developing a practice of educational work -- for others, and myself -- in music and language. Even as I write this I wonder how I can stretch this further than the roles of music and ESL teacher that seem clearly defined to me, yet maybe more starting points than destinations. We'll see! And lots of questioning... questioning... tearing down and rebuilding.


The peril of rebuilding the same thing you had before is always there, of course. I tried hard to push myself down some less-traveled roads these last couple months, with limited success. It's true that right now I am spent and scattered; were I writing a few weeks ago, I would have a good deal more fire in my words, and in my heart. It's not a looming sense of catastrophe I fear, it's the long, slow decline of repeating your same bad habits and excuses, never content to rest from shoring up the mountain of procrastination, regrets, and cast-off dreams that you give your time and breath to.


On the plus side, I did finally get around to procuring the necessary ingredients for a couple of Thai curries as authentic as I will likely ever prepare. This involved some perseverance on my part to obtain the assistance of the staff at Oriental Harvest, to in turn obtain for me the magical galangal, Thai basil, and lime leaves that would make the curry gods smile favorably upon my saucepan. This oft-dreamed of feat being achieved, several batches of curry resulted, much to the delight of the children.

There's been lots of cooking going on, in general, in fact. We've both managed to kick the eating-out habit without much in the way of withdrawal symptoms, largely by virtue (?) of not having the money to partake in it. This has been unquestionably good, although right now I would kill for a burrito, of the Big Fat variety. Should probably stop writing about food, I suppose.

And so, the question you've been asking yourself all along: What am I doing for money/work/contribution to the economy? Right?

Well, the last few weeks I've: Attended to the janitorial needs of the TRANZAC, played numerous gigs with assorted songwriters of various regional affiliations and dispositions, taught my first banjo lessons, held down the reception desk of a law firm specializing in litigation, worked the sound board for a surprise birthday bash replete with band, taught ESL classes on grammar, idioms, and the Zapatistas, done an overnight shift back at the psych unit, and DJ'ed my first and possibly last Waitangi Day party, ever.

Where it goes from here, who knows. Hopefully in a pleasant direction.

For now, we sleep.

Love,

m.

Yearly Update

Greetings Fambly,

Hope everyone's keeping well out there. Here in Toronto, where rumours of summer's death appear to have been greatly exaggerated, it's pushing 35 degrees of humid, friday fatigue outside.

I'm inside, sweating at the computer. Go figure.



Well, as it is traditional to dust off this tome solely for "significant life events" [or S.L.E.] these days (I blame Facebook and it's culture of 24-7 omniscience), I am doing just that. Thought it was the right thing to do.

Anyhow, on with it. The S.L.E. of most note at present is that I am going to be moving on from my position at the youth psychiatric unit (which must remain nameless in these hypertextual pages), the steadiest job I ever done work, at the end of June. It's been a unique year, all right -- but more on that later.

The other things that should bear mentioning are that I am finally putting into practice my infamous, formerly highly-classified "Berube Plan", and will be doing the CELTA ESL teacher training course throughout the month of July. I thought it was an "ESP" course and signed up. Much to my chagrin, it also has naught to with the Celts, either.

Then, come mid-September, the plan as it stands now is that I shall embark with the one and only Coco Love Alcorn on a Canada-crossing binge of music making to flog her forthcoming, much-anticipated, and sure-to-be-a-smash-hit album. Here tracks from the prior, here.

As Coco tells it, we should be on the road more or less non-stop until the end of November. I am much looking forward to making music as a (more) regular part of my diet once again, and well, it's certainly going to be rather regular.

What, you might ask (if you're still reading this, that is), do ESL/ESP and music have in common with each other? The answer, as far as I can see it now, is that I am making a more or less deliberate move to weave parts of my life together for the better. That means really getting back to core strengths and finding ways to use them creatively, as opposed to sitting back and dreaming of a world where things are already going my way.

My focus is on learning, collaborating, and communicating, and the ways in which these can be expressed and realized. I'm excited. I suppose in a way, that's always what my focus has been, but it's a matter of acknowledging that, and then allocating resources accordingly... Getting "in-phase" with oneself, as it were. I welcome any stories (well, I always welcome stories) you might care to share and celebrate about any journeys you're on, not to mention advice.

***

I suppose the future is necessarily more tangible in my head than on the page at this point, but I'll keep things updated here more regularly -- as much for my own clarity! -- from now on. But it also makes more sense in context; I'd like to try and recap some highlights from the past year, since it's been such a transformative one for me, but also rather fragmentary.

This past year (and a bit) was the year I...

Got into clawhammer banjo, worked on a salary, put on a seven bass improv-extravaganza, recorded a solo EP of my sappy songs, paid-off my personal debts and had my student loans returned to the government from collections, got my interior decorator on with Myia in not one but two apartments, played host to and played music with many old friends and some new ones from all over the place, and schemed, dreamed, and reflected to no end.

That's my short list -- no names to protect the innocent and the guilty alike, you know who you are.

Here's to the road ahead, my friends. Much love to you all.

m.